6. The Tap Tap – The Bus Driver

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Our little Santa Claus goody is, so they say themselves, an extraordinary band! They exist already since 1998 and were formed from students of the Jedličkův ústav. They have found a solid place in the Czech „šoubyznys“. The extraordinary aspect of their meeting lies in the place, or rather in the circumstances – the Jedličkův ústav is the oldest Czech institution for physically disabled people. This vivid and humoristic group tours the Czech Republic – in summer also the bigger festivals – and the world most of the year in order to make their audience laugh and think.

Introduction by Katja, Translations by Mareike & Barbora


The Bus Driver

Marek: Valenta:
My new vehicle is fast like the wind and strong like the bull,
And the world tastes like a well done steak with him again,
The life has a cadence, I feel like being 1,6m tall at least
And everything is like it should be.

Vojta Dyk:
That’s not a vehicle, little man, this is some fake,
This is a bike and you must not go to the bus with it,
Yes the one who has a bike has to leave the game (1),
So God bless you, kiss and go.
I am the director of this bus,
I have my rules and my know-how
M.V.: You are the director of this bus
And it is a bus to the station “ouha, ouha”.

Ondřej Ládek:
You can’t come here with your bike, you have it here black on white
Don’t want me to shout on the top of my lungs
Simply remember if you don’t disappear with this bike at once
You will see something,
I can’t stand here any sh*t.

Marek Valenta:
I have small shoes but my rights are exactly the same like yours
So start to think about it as well,
What you have black on white does not need to be black and white,
For you it is a bike, for me a compensation aid.
You are the director of this bus,
But the world is not a traffic lane.

Ondřej Ládek:
I am the director of this bus,
And you do not disturb my circles with your bike.

Bike is bike and it will remain a bike,
It is and it was like this and nothing will change about it.
Stupid person is a stupid person and will remain stupid,
Somebody has short legs and somebody needs double take (2).
Bike is bike and it will remain a bike,
My brain stands still from your arguments.
Stupid person is a stupid person and will remain stupid
If you have the rules you should know them.

Marek Valenta:
don’t want to deal … [kách],
And don’t want to argue neither
I just want to get what I am entitled to, be sure about it.
People like me
Don’t live only in fairy tales
We drive here all together so let us pass.

Dan Bárta:
I will let you come with your bike and my authority will be lost in a second,
You do it once and everybody expects you to do it again
Rules are rules and even the villager will accept that
If you want an exception go back to the Snow white.
I am the director of this bus,
Take appeal to God, if you wish.

Marek Valenta:
You are the director of this bus,
Next time you will take my white stick or wooden leg.


1) – The Czech word “kolo” has double meaning in English – it means “circle” but also “bike”. The translation Yes the one who has a bike has to go out from the game creates in original Czech version a word game – Ten kdo ma kolo musi z kola ven.
2) – the original Czech version plays with the antonyms – někdo má krátký nohy někdo dlouhý vedení “krátký” (short) and “dlouhy” (long)